Something worth fighting for
by UESGURL
Summary: It had all started with a headache. A simple migraine. But it ended with a love story so great that it touched the hearts of everyone around them. Clace.
1. Chapter 1

Prologue

Cpov

It had all started in the beginning of my sophomore year, the headaches. I thought nothing of them, I mean why should I? It's normal to get headaches; especially as a high school student with and overbearing brother. So I chose to ignore it, I thought that it was no big dead.

Oh how wrong was I.

It was around Christmas time when it first happened; the hallucinations. I was in a coffee shop with Jon, our mom and Luke had gone to Paris for some art convention. We had been talking about the holidays and I saw a dark shadow from the corner of my eye. I turned my head to see a shadow of a person so naturally I freaked. But Jon couldn't see it, and when I turned to look back at it, neither could I.

When our parents got home a week later I was immediately questioned by my mother. She thought I was on drugs, if only we had actually known what caused the hallucinations.

2 weeks later I was sent to a psychologist. My mother said that along with the hallucinations I had been acting differently too. Needlessly to say; the therapy did not work. The hallucinations continued throughout the rest of the school year, getting a a little bit more worse every day. By that time I had hallucinations on the daily, but never told my mother because I didn't want to worry her. Jon on the other hand was a different story. He had to constantly defend me from bullies, people had saw what was going on and labeled me as "crazy Clary"

Then it happened.

It was a cool july day, july 15th to be exact.I woke up with a massive headache, but blamed it on allergies. Oh how that was a mistake. It was second period when it happened, the only class I share with Jon. I stood up to hand in my test and everything around me got blurry. The ringing that once plagued my ears started again. The next thing I know I'm on the ground, shaking violently, listening to my brother frantically calling the police as I slipped into darkness.

Oh July 20th my life had changed forever. We found out that I had a malignant tumour the size of a ping pong ball in my brain. I was dying.

We later found out exactly what it was. I had mixed glioma, a fast growing cancerous tumor that only accounts for about 1% of brain cancers.

After we had found out my mother and Luke decided that we should move. As wrong as it sounds, she liked to maintain a certain image within our town, and didn't want that implicized. By the time July came we were moving into our new Montana home, it was extremely different from New York.

The houses were huge. We could afford a bigger house here due to the fact that we weren't paying crazy rent in N.Y. Even though we lived in a mansion, Jon and I decided to pic the rooms that were connected by a sharing bathroom. Jon wanted to be close to me in case anything were to happen, he would be right there.

My room was huge, no doubt about that. The walls were still white, which contrasted greatly with my dark purple bedding. I had a huge window that wrapped around all four walls of my room, and a window seat that did so aswell. When I walked up to one of the walls and looked out the window I smiled. For as far as I could see there was just Forrest, and in the background there was mountains. I knew I would start liking it here soon, despite the reason we had to move.

Thinking of my situation I immediately grew sad. I fingered my waist length red curly hair, knowing that sometime soon it would be gone, and sadness filled my heart. I had gotten Luke to convince my mother to let me not start chemo until the summer was over, give me a couple of normal months. It took along of convincing, but eventually she caved, she just wanted me to be happy.

I walked over to another wall and looked out the window, I found myself looking at the wall of the house next door, the bedroom was set up like mine, except the whole room had been decorated white on purpose, how weird. Soon enough exhaustion hit me, and I turned to walk to my bed to take a nap, but something caught my attention. A tall blonde had e tiered the bedroom of the house next door, his gold eyes met mine and I swear I felt something spark inside me. We stared for about a minute before I grabbed the curtain and dragged it across the 4 wall windows, enveloping my room in darkness.

Little did I know, this mystery guy would give me hope.


	2. Chapter 2

C pov

I sighed and cracked my back as I set the paint roller down. We have been living here for about two weeks and it was time to finally get stuff done, so I decided to paint my room. The parts of the walls that weren't plagued with large windows were painted a deep purple, and one wall was painted black with chalkboard paint, it was amazing.

"Hey Clare wanna go an- Jesus christ what did you do to your room" I turn around to see Jon leaning against my door frame, his big 6'4 build towering oved mg small 5' frame.

I smile. "Well I gotta have a room that reflects my mood, don't I?" I remark as I walk past him, picking up all the paint brushes and buckets on the way. I walk down the long bright hallway towards the stairs and I can hear his footsteps following me.

" Clare. School starts in 2 weeks and you haven't even left the house yet. I met the neighbors and I think you may really like them." I stop, thinking about the mysterious golden boy that I saw through my window a couple weeks ago, but shook the thought from my head.

"Well Jon you and I both know that I can't go to school, so I don't see why that changes anything" I exclaim as I put my hands on my hips. He raises an eyebrow. "What do you mean you're not going to school?" He asks confused.

I roll my eyes. I love my brother, I do, but sometimes he doesn't think things out clearly. "Once I start chemo do you really think that I'm gonna be able to go to school?" I question, the thought of me missing out on so much upsetting me even more so my voice starts to raise."I'm going to be weak,thin,pukey and bald. I'm going to be tired all the time, do you really think that I would be able to physically function at school?!" I knew I shouldn't have yelled, it wasn't his fault. This would be the first time ever that we wouldn't be going to school together. I saw his face soften.

"I'm sorry clare" he says as he brings me into a hug."I just think I haven't fully accepted the fact that you're actually sick yet, it's too hard to believe" I rub mg hand along his back, that's understandable, hell sometimes I even try to forget that I'm sick. "It's okay Jon, really. I don't think that it will finally sink in until I start chemo." I say as I pull away from him, looking into his sad eyes, k can't blame him, if he were in my situation I would be destroyed. Then I thought of something that would make him happy.

"There are trails in the woods back there, right?" I ask, looking up at him, seeing a sense of realization cross his eyes. "Yes clary, there are. But i dknt think im comfortable with you going out alone into the woods. You did that a lot back home before you got sick, and we never knew what you did in there. You would go for hours and hours and come back very dirty." I smile at the thought. The woods was my safe place, I always went there. I patted his shoulder. "I'm gonna go for a walk" I smile as I walk past him, and some even wider when I hear his groan. I shut my door and hear him shout that he wants me home in 3 hours max.

I take off my pajamas and open my drawers, pulling out some clothes and setting them on the bed. I pull on a pair of ripped black skinny jeans and a grey camisol, then throw on a big loose green and black flannel that I stole from Jon. I look at myself in the mirror. Even though I haven't started chemo yet I have lost a lot of weight, it wasn't noticeable until now because I was always in sweats or pajamas. I look away from the mirror picking up my black combat boots and throw my hair into a loose ponytail. I knew Jon would want to see me before I left but I really wanted to bug him, smiling I pulled my curtain slightly open and opened part of the bug window, I climbed onto the big tree and them dropped to the ground. The cool Montana air felt amazing on my face.

Skipping, well not actually skipping, but you get the point. I went towards the woods, I stopped before I reached the treelline !nd just looked at the Forrest. It looked thick and dark, to most people it would have looked scary, but to me it looked inviting.

After about an hour later I found myself sitting on a rock near a hidden waterfall that I had found when I hear branches breaking behind me. I quickly turn around to see a tall sparkly man, and he's the one who looks confused. "Hey Magnus whats-" I see another tall slender man with black hair approach him.

Dread fills my body, I don't want to meet people, I didn't want to have to make friends just to have them watch me die. The one who I presume was Magnus walks towards me.

"Well what's your name ,biscuit, I have never seen you around here before." I widen my eyes at his forwardness but quickly shake out of it. "My name is Clary" I respond hesitantly and he smiles. "Well what a wonderful name! My name is Magnus and that guy over there is my boyfriend, Alec." The taller man gave a smile and came to sit down next to me. "So,Clary, did you just move here? We have never seen you around before." I felt Magnus sit down on the rock next to me.

A couple hours later I found myself walking home, Jon was gonna kill me. But on the bright side I did make some friends, we joked and laughed for hours, it was amazing. I would deal with the whole dying issue later, because today, I actually felt normal.


	3. Chapter 3

**thanks for all** of **the lovely reviews and feedback! I've had this story on my mind for a while and I finally got the guts to post it. I hope that this story becomes everything that I hope it can become.**

 **C pod.**

I started chemo in a week. Summer was ending which meant that I finally have to face the reality of what's going on.

I spent the rest of the summer inside either reading or doing my art. I never saw Alec or Magnus again, I thought I had heard their voices once, along with two others I didn't recognize when Jon had friends over, I went to my room.

School hadn't even started and Jon was already popular, it's just how he is. He went to football tryouts a little while back and recently found out that he got on the team, ever since he's always been out spending time with them. Honestly if you ask my opinion I think he forgot about me; no he's not a bad person, he just hasn't realized how serious this situation is because it doesn't feel real yet.i had been staying away from Jon so he wouldn't see how sick I was, in fact, he hasn't actually physically seen me since our discussion about school. He's always been out with friends and I'm always sleeping.

I hoped that it would never feel real, that it was one big nightmare; but it wasn't.

Sighing I rolled out of bed and wobbled up to the mirror in my room, my reflection scared me, I did not look like this yesterday. My reflection showed a small extremely pale girl with dark bags under her eyes. My face was hollowed out so my eyes were huge looking, making the bags more prominent.(think of what Ellen looked like in the _beginning_ of 'to the bone').

Everything hurt, my arms, my legs, my back, everything. I was wearing a pair of pajama shorts and a sports bra, for some reason I was extremely hot, I could feel the beads of sweat forming on my forehead, daring to trickle down.

I looked at the rest of my body in the mirror, I had angry bruises littering my ribs and my spine, my ribs were starting to show from how much weight I had lost, my legs were too thin, I was dying. I had a definite feeling that I was sick, and not the cancer type of sick, but being sick was fatal for someone like me.

All of the sudden I felt a sharp pain in my head, my ears started to ring and I couldn't move, I couldnt breathe. I let out a strangled breathy scream, somehow thinking that it would help the pain, needless to say, it didn't. I needed to get Jon, I needed to get to a doctor. Shaking, I removed my hands from covering my face and froze at what I saw. Blood. It covered my hands and I slowly looked up into the mirror and almost screamed. There was blood gushing out of my nose and smeared blood all around my mouth and nose. Fuck.

Stumbling, I ran to the door and flew it open, leaving a bloody handling as I did so. As I got into the hallway I felt my energy completely leave my body and everything started to spin. I held onto the railing as I made my way downstairs, following the sound of Jon's voice.

It was then that I realized that I heard multiple voices and laughter. The team was here, just my fucking luck. I stumbled into the living room, almost to the kitchen where I could hear Jon bragging about some girl.

I stopped in the middle of the living room and grabbed my head as the ringing started again, only spreading the blood even more. I needed to get to Jon, then I would be safe, only a few more feet to the door, only a few more. I gasped in relief as my hand finally touched the wall next to the door, this house would need a good washing after this.

I pushed through the double doors and gasped at the effort it took, I was faced with an entire table full of football players. I saw Jon and his smile immediately dropped, sheer terror replacing it, amd all of the color leaving his face.

"Jon" I croaked, leaning against the wall, trying not to look at everyone else. " I don't feel go-" next thing I know Jon was jumping out of his seat and his hands were on my forehead. " Jesus Clare you're freezing" he said, fear still in his voice and his eyes frantic.

I couldn't really understand what happened next, I was leaning against Jon for stability and that was it. I could hear Jon barking out orders to his teammates, the last thing I remember him saying was him telling someone named Sebastian to get a blanket.

I was wrapped in the blanket then Jon picked me up bridal style and ran out the door to the car. I remember being put in the car and then it went all black.

JON POV

I didn't know what happened, one moment u was goofing off with my mates and the next thing I know my younger sister is crashing through the door looking like she was on deaths doorstep. Everything happened so fast after that, I felt her forehead and her body temperature was way down, but she was sweating.

I got her into the blanket and ran outside toward the car, Jace, Sebastian and the others rushing out after me, everyone was shouting, including me. We all decided that I was in no state to drive, so Jace hopped in the driver's seat and Sebastian was in the passenger seat calling th hospital letting them know that we were coming in and it was an emergency. I was in the back seat,I gently held Clary head in my lap as she was lying down taking up the rest of the seats.

The drive to the hospital seemed to take hours when in actuality it only took 10 minutes. I don't know how we got here without getting pulled over or crashing. Jace jerked the car to a stop and him and Sebastian both unbuckled their seatbelts and jumped out of the car, opening the door for me as I carefully pulled my baby sister into my arms.

All e of us ran into the hospital where there was a group of doctors waiting for us. Clary was taken from my arms and was placed on a gurney, as they were examining her I was asked a billion questions that I didn't know the answer to.

After several minutes of panic all 3 of us were kicked out of the room and sent to the waiting room. I pressed my back against a wall and slid down onto the floor, resting my head between my knees, thinking. Mom and Luke were still in Paris, like they would care anyways.

My thoughts were interrupted by Sebastian and Jace. "Dude, what the fuck just happened" i looked up at them, not knowing what to say so I just stood up, remembering who I needed to call.

"Excuse me" I said as I pushed passed them, grabbing my phone out of pocket as I did so. I went into my contacts and found the one I needed, the dried blood all over my hands and shirt bringing tears to my eyes. I then pressed the contact I needed and waited for the other person to pick up. The phone kept ringing and ringing, I was sure that they weren't going to pick up, but then I heard a voice at the other end.

"This is Simon Lewis"


	4. Chapter 4

Jpov

Beeping. That' been the only sound made in Clary's room for the past hour and a half, well if you don' count the small talk conversed with Simon since he's gotten here. The atmosphere has been anything but joyful, she hasn' woken up and we haven't heard any good news.

The doctor told us that she had gotten a virus, probably from spending too much time outside without proper protection. They said that because her immune system is already shit due to her cancer she got very sick very quickly. They said it wasn' anything to do with the cancers affects or it possibly getting worse which is a huge relief, but they want to start her chemo as soon as possible.

Jace and Sebastian were still in the waiting room and my teammates have been texting me the entire time weve been here. Clary and I have already made stories for every possible scenario to tell people if something were to happen and she needed to be taken into the hospital before people knew. For this scenario were gonna tell people that she' a hemophiliac, and her bloody nose wouldn' stop, making her pale, weak, and faint.

I had told Jace and Sebastian to go home, that everything was fine, but behind their playboy personas were people who cared, so they stayed.

My thoughts were interrupted by the heart monitor picking up speed slightly, Simon and I immediately rush towards her side to see her eyes start to flutter. Frantic, I run into the hallway, " I need a nurse in here!". Soon there are multiple nurses in the room with us, two nurses were trying to call Clary down as the other removed the breathing tube from her throat. She was awake.

 _six hours later_

After multiple arguments and conversations with the doctor Clary had finally decided to start chemo a week from today. One of the issues that came with this though... now people knew she existed. Jace knew of her, meaning Izzy, Alec, and Magnus would know. This was all falling apart.

I glance at the passenger seat next to me, making sure clary was still asleep, then I let the tears fall. It was all becoming real. My sister had cancer, my parents constantly travel in Europe, never coming home so they don' have to deal with the buren of Clary' s cancer, and I was taking care of her.

As we pull into the driveway I give Clary a little nudge, waking her up. "Rise and shine, c'mon, were home. How about we get some real food in you instead of that hospital crap aye?" I smile looking at Clary. She just rolls her eyes and storms out of the car, I give Simon, who' in the back seat a questioning look and he just puts his hands up, " I don' know man".

We walk in the house to see Clary sitting on the couch, staring at nothing, but this time, Simon is the first to speak. "Clare? Are you ok? I know it's a stupid question because you're obviously not okay... BUT are you ok?" She doesn' say anything for a bit, she just looks up. " tomorrow I'm going to hang out with you and the people you seem so fond with next door. People know about me now so it's no use hiding. Better meet them before I get all sick and gross."

Before either of us can respond she stands up and walks towards her room, then slams her door shut. Sighing, I run my hands through my hair and walk into the kitchen. What are we going to do, what is clary going to DO? I turn and look at Simon, who had followed me into the kitchen, and again, before I can even say anything he starts talking. "I know jon" I look at him confused. "I know her cancers getting worse, and Clary's ignoring it as if it's a cold that will heal itself. And the fact that she's getting sicker and sicker every day and the doctors not finding anything is a sign that there' something worse that is developing. We need to take care of her, make her realize what's actually happening, make sure she gets her treatment" when Simon hi usher I look up at him to see a tear streaming down his face.

Clary and Simon had been best friends since before they could walk. Back at home they did everything together, they were inseparable, they grew up together and everyone thought that they'd become a couple, but their friendship only grew stronger. But then Clary got sick, and then we moved, turning everyones lives upside down.

I watched Simon weep, trying to hold back his tears, which only helped bring tears to my eyes, little did we know, Clary was upstairs fighting another battle of her own.

Cpov

I sat at my desk, the light in my room dim due to the sunset shining through my windows. In front of me laid a piece of paper and a pen. The piece of paper had six words written on the top, six words can' do much harm, but these six words were heavy with emotion and despair. On the paper read 's _ix things I'll never get to do'._ As I looked at those words I felt more emotion course through me. There were so many things that I wouldn't live to do, I'm not naive enough to think that I'll beat this. Unlike my brother I have a grip on reality, unlike him I'm not going to be at my treatments thinking that they're going to save me... they're just prolonging my unavoidable death.

With tears clouding my eyes I picked up the pen and started with a shaky hand, to write on the paper. Graduating high chool wasn't something that I would be able to do, hell, I wasn't really in school meant that I would never go to art school like I had dreamed. What does it matter though? Dreams are for suckers. I would never get to be able to be an amazing aunt to Jon's kids, never grow old enough even.

Putting down the pen I used my sleeves to wipe my eyes. My life was being cut short, there was no stopping that no matter how much yoh hoped and prayed. Sniffling I picked up the pen and put the tip on the paper, but before I could write out the phrase the familiar picture of a man with gold eyes filled my mind. I soon shake out the thought and finish my list with my last never to be activity.

 _to fall in love._

Looking down at the list, particularly the last phrase, I give out a strangled laugh and climb into bed, the unwanted image of a man with gold eyes on my mind as I drifted off into darkness.


	5. Chapter 5

Cpov.

Unike yesterday I woke up feeling refreshed. I sit up in my cushioned bed walk towards my closet, time to pick out my clothes for the day. Today was the day that I was going to see people, and most likely make friends. Friends that I will eventually have to tell that I'm sick. Friends that I will have to leave behind.

I pull on a pair of black ripped jeans and a dark green vneck, then my oversized black cardigan. I pulled my curly hair up into a high ponytail and stopped to look in the mirror. I was unbelievably thin, I started chemo in two days, Jon would be returning to school in two days.

God how I wished that I could return to school with him. Its funny how almost every other teen, including me, would constantly complain about having to wake up early and go to school. But now, I wish that I didn't take it for granted, I want to go to school, make friends, go to comic book stores with Simon, and just, be me. But that's impossible now. It's impossible because I'm that fateful day my entire world had turned on it's axis.

I turned away from my mirror and trekked down the stairs into the living room and then the kitchen. I entered to see Jon sitting on one of the white barstools eating a bowl of cereal. "So" I start "what's the plan for today?" I lean across the counter, raising an eyebrow at Jon.

He swallows the remaining cereal in his mouth and puts the spoon down. "I was thinking that we could all go and have a bonfire by the waterfall" he looks up at me expectantly and I smile, he knows how much I love bonfires.

Before I could respond the doorbell rings. This is it. I shoo Jon aside and go walk up to the door. I take a deep breath, preparing myself, then open the door with a big smile. I'm met with 4 faces, but before I can say anything I feel a large impact on my chest and my feet being lifted from the ground.

"BISCUIT" The figure yells. When I'm put down I look up at the person and my confusion suddenly turns into a mix of surprise and happiness. I look from Magnus to the man next to him and notice that it's Alec.

"Oh my God I didn't realize that it was you, I'm so glad to see you again!" I smile looking at the two. I can see the blonde and the black haired female behind them looking confused. Then I hear someone clearing their throat and I turn to see Jon raising an eyebrow. "How do you know Alec and Magnus?" He starts, and I smile.

"I met them when we first moved here. I went for a walk in the woods behind the house and ran into them" I smile, it was good to se familiar faces. I see a look of registration pass his face. "You always did like going in the woods" he smirked. I just smiled and turned around. Then the tall female made herself forward and smiled.

She looked like a model, she was tall, around 5'9 maybe? She had porcelain skin and dark eyes. Her hair was jet black and was around my length, her teeth were perfect and she had the perfect figure. I suddenly found myself self conscious. She walked up to me and gave me a big, warm hug, it surprsingly didn't make me feel uncomfortable.

"Hi I'm Isabelle" I smile, her voice is warm and inviting, which also surprised me. "Hi guys, I'm Clarissa, Jon's sister, but if you call me that I will kill you, so call me Clary" I laugh, and they all smile.

"Clary. That' a beautiful name. Is that your natural hair?" Isabelle asks as she fingers the hair in my ponytail. "Actually it is" I state. She smiles, "Well it's beautiful. I can tell that we'r going to be good friends" and I actually believe her.

Then I turn to the blonde and find that I recognize him too. He's looking at me in a way that I can't describe. "Ah, well isn't it the boy from the bedroom" I tease, which makes him flash his also perfect smile. I then feel Jon's hand on my shoulder. "Umm, what do you mean 'the boy from the bedroom clare?" I turn to him and smile. "Oh calm down big bro. Our rooms face eachother so occasionally we see eachother"

He looks down and grunts."I'm watching yoh Jace, touch her and you die" everyone laughs including me. Jace. That suits him. I turn to everyone else, "So, are we ready to go?"

* * *

JON POV

15 minutes later and were walking on the trail. Clary had to go say goodbye to Simon because he had a flight home later, he had to get back for school.

I have a backpack on my back full of stuff for Smores, knowing that it will be a fun day. Clary really needs a day like this. She' Ben carrying so much weight all by herself since she was diagnosed, and our parents are no help.

I look off to the side of the trail and smile at the sight. Instead of walking on the trail like a normal person, Clary is off to the side walking on fallen trees and jumping from rock to rock. She sees happy, at home. Even since she was little, Clary was always obsessed with the woods. No one knows why. Alec and Magnus are in front of me talking and Isabelle and Jace were on either side of me.

"Hey Jon, if you don' mind me asking. Is Clary alright" Jace asks. I turn either way to see both Jace and Isabelle looking at me with worried eyes.

"What do you mean" I start, looking down. "Well you see" Isabelle starts, "it's just that Clary looks unwell. She's very thin and you can tell that she' starting to tire" I look up to see that she's right, Clary is starting to get out of breath.

"We just want to make sure everything is alright" Jace says while looking at me. I sigh "everything is fine, don' worry about it." I can see the siblings glace at eachother, obviously not believing me. But that doesn't matter, they don't need to believe me.

Clary suddenly breaks the silence, standing on a tall rock. "Look you guys, we're here" and she was right, behind her, in the distance you could see a waterfall. She was looking at it with pure joy. But what she didn't see was Jace doing the same, but instead of looking at the waterfallwith joy, he was looking at her.


	6. Chapter 6

So sorry that I haven' been updating, I've had a lot of stuff and I just forgot about it but I'm back.

Cpov

Water. It' essential in life, for both nourishment and pleasure. Water can easily be your enemy and drown you, or it can easily be your friend and hydrate you on the brink of death. These were my thoughts as I floated on my back by the waterfall.

As i float here, all i can think about is 'what would happened if I just sank. To float in the abyss and never return' but I just smiled, I'd never be that lucky, life has enjoyed ducking me over in every possible way. I had to leave new York and my best friend after finding out that I had cancer. My parents don't care and would rather be in Europe than with their sick daughter, and I can no longer go to school.

My thoughts are interrupted by a muffled voice. I look over to see the blonde, Jace, calling me over. I turned over and swan to the grassline. Jon and the others were all sitting around the campfire.

"What's up?" I question as i pull myself up and sit next to him. It's kinda funny how jace is the first person i saw here, yet i havent spoken to him yet. There was a reason though, I've been keeping my distance. There was just something about him, I don' know how to explain it, he just gave me this...feeling. And I did not like that, not one bit.

I guess I was wrinkling my eyebrows at my thoughts because Jace turned his head in a curious way and looked at me. He didn't just look at me like a stranger would look at you in the street, no, he actually _looked_ at me. "What's on your mind, Clary" he questioned. I gave a soft smile, what _wasn't_ I thinking about.

I shrug my shoulders "just life I guess." I turn my head and look at him, he looks like he's contemplating something, but then he starts talking.

" So what's your story, you stay holed up in your room and never come out, and the first time I did actually see you in person we were taking you to the hospital" I sigh and look down, i was hoping that everyone wpuld forget about that, seems like they didn't. "Well if you must know. We moved here because my parents thought that with them being gone all of the time, new York wasn't the safest place for Jon and I". I reply, lying through my teeth.

Jace makes a face and looks like he' thinking. "I guess that makes sense, but why would they think it was unsafe if you're older?" Laughing I look at him."that's exactly the point, they were afraid that we'd run off and do 'nefarious' things with a bunch of 'degenerates'" I exclaim while putting up air quotes for emphasis which seems to have amused Jace as well.

It's silent for a while, but not an awkward silence, it was comfortable. Then Jace suddenly turns and picks up something next to him, then turns to me. "Here, no offense, but you really look like you should eat something" I look down to the silver wrapping in his hand and smile, it was a cinnamon poptart.

Something about this gesture made me very happy and I looked up at him. "I love these so much! I haven't had one since I was little" I exclaim while wolfing down the poptart. I turn to Jace and see him smiling, which makes me give out a small laugh.

I pulled my long hair up into a bun, I was thinking about cutting it soon, it's gonna fall out anyways I guess. He was about to say something when a familiar nagging voice called us. " come on guys we'e leaving, it' getting late" I turn around and see Jon looking at us, holding one of the backpacks. I slowly get up and start walking towards him to get my stuff.

We walked side by side in silence, I started chemo soon, then all of this would go away, I would have to distance myself. I'e already become much closer to these people than I intended and that was bad. Jon could always tell what I was thinking, I loved, but also hated that based on the situation.

"You know that you have to tell them eventually clare. You start treatment in a week and they e not just going to forget that you exist." I know that he's just trying to help, but I wanted to figure this out on my own. I had enough to deal with, I don't need to add this to the plate.

"I know jon...i'll do it eventually but I'm just not ready. It doesn' feel real yet" he just looks at me and gives my shoulder a squeeze then throws his arm around me, I lean into him as we walk.

Out of the corner of my eye I swear that I saw something black, I thought I saw it earlier but I wasn't sure. Then out of nowhere a large black bird swooped down and flew right in front of my face. It was so close that I could practically feel the feathers on my skin.

I screamed and jumped back, only to be greeted with confused and curious eyes. "Clary are you OK? What's wrong?" Isabelle asked. I look around for a minute and just force a smile. "Sorry guys, a bug flew near my ear and I hate bugs" I laugh. They seemed to have bought it because they start laughing too.

"Aww is little Clary afraid of bugs" Magnus teased, and we all just joked around on the way back k to the house

* * *

Once we got home I ran straight up to my room. Using that I needed to use the restroom as an excuse. Once I got up there I pulled all of my curtains closed and sat on my bed for a hot minute. Letting out a deep breath I pulled out my phone and went to my emergency contacts, and clicked on that dreaded name.

The phone rang a couple of times before she picked up. "This is doctor Shepard how may I help you?" Her soft but determined voice on the other line gave me chills. "Hey, it's Clary, I'm calling to follow up on my test results."

I could feel an immediate change in mood over the phone. "I was actually going to call you today" her voice was somber "your glioma has metastasized. Another one has unfortunately formed I your occipital lobe. Have you been experiencing any hallucinations or small seizures lately?"

I just let out a deep breath and closed my eyes, letting the tears drop. "No, no I haven't" I lied. Then she spoke again. "Well that's good, because of this new information we want to see you tomorrow to start chemo, we want to get a handle on this situation as soon as possible. Is that ok with you?" I' quiet for a minute "yeah, that' find with me, I'll be there at 8 like usual" my voice was dead.

"Okay great, I'll see you tomorrow. And Clary, I'm sorry" I just quietly thank her and hang up. I sit on my bed for a minute before pulling my knees up to my chest, resting my head between my knees and let the tears fall.

It was finally real.


End file.
